As the Premier League season is almost upon us our very own ‘no average’ Joe talks football in his own simplest way and points out the first of ‘some more’ players, brief portraits, in an almost poetic allusion to some of those greats of our game.

Football remembered in the most basic of ways. Ahead of the campaign which starts this Saturday, here’s Joe’s list number one…

Alan Shearer – Top of this list for a reason.

Eric Cantona – King.

David Beckham – Underrated footballer, overrated icon.

Ryan Giggs – World at his feet.

Thierry Henry – Class in a glass.

Matt Le Tissier – 1% best in the world, for 1% of the game.

Steven Gerrard – Liverpool.

Gary Neville – Manchester United.

Tony Adams – Arsenal.

Frank Lampard – Chelsea.

Gary Lineker – Incapable of scoring a spectacular goal.

Tony Yeboah – Incapable of scoring a boring one.

Martin Keown – A gentleman in wolf’s clothing.

Peter Schmeichel – Best we’ve ever known.

Kasper Schmeichel – Watered down by a generation.

Sergio Aguero – that goal.

Dennis Bergkamp – those goals.

Wayne Rooney – Top of England and Manchester.

Ian Wright – Showman.

Roy Keane – Seeing red.

Patrick Vieira – Seeing red cards.

Paul Gascoigne – Flawed genius.

David Batty – Dirty.

Dennis Wise – Dirty Pt 2.

Denis Irwin – Unsung hero.

Jamie Vardy – Fast.

Raheem Sterling – Faster.

Kyle Walker – Fastest.

Paul Ince – Governor.

Michael Owen – Could have been the greatest.

Andy Cole – One half of the assassination squad.

Dwight Yorke – Other half.

N’Golo Kante – Marathon per game.

Mohamed Salah – Gold.

Paul Scholes – Zidane said, so must be true.

Des Walker – You’ll never beat him.

Vinnie Jones – Ouch.

Robbie Fowler – Kid off the estate.

Ronaldo – Kid from another galaxy.

Jason Lee – Pineapple, anyone?

*Article provided by Joe Archer (Health & Lifestyle Correspondent).

*Main image @footballmemorys Jason Lee was a cult hero at Nottingham Forest.